It’s easy to come up with an idea and keep it tucked away safely in your head.
Tell no one; you have this thing that cannot be touched or criticized by others. You can idealize it–make it into more than it might even be.
It is all yours, a precious thing that you know is perfect. And you can keep it there–in your mind forever–untainted.
The Problem with Expectations
For awhile, now, I’ve followed Laura Mills’s blog, The Blank Page. Laura is…well, I hate calling her a teenage writer because she’s crossed the threshold of 18, and if someone called me a teenager at 18, I would have probably told them where they could stuff their “teenager.” So…young adult. Laura is a young adult who’s had insight in her truly teen years that I didn’t stumble upon until my mid 20s or so.
She wrote a good entry about expectation vs. reality. I won’t spoil it because it’s worth the read, but the gist: what we build up in our mind often seems better than reality. But what matters is the work, and Laura gets that.
The [Safe] Bubble
I’ve known a lot of people who, once I got them talking, confessed there were all kinds of things they wanted to do. They wanted to start a business, pursue an art, or just do something cool for the sake of doing it because they liked the thought. When asked why they never tried any of those things, they said one of two things:
- I was scared of what others would think…
- It was better in my mind…
The Safety of the Mind (Hiding in Your Head)
I can–right now–think of several cool things that were not in my head 10 minutes ago. In 10 more minutes, I can build those things into something perfect. The only problem: it only seems perfect in the safety of my mind. My mind has not done the work; my mind has inflated a mere idea into something I can carry, a secret perfection only I know about.
That does me no good. That does nobody any good. I’ve seriously heard people who have seen a movie, read a book, or seen a product offered for sale get angry because, “I thought of that first!”
So what? Lots of other people probably did, too. And you probably really didn’t think of it like the person or people who made it real. (In fact, you didn’t think of it for real because you idealized it in your mind, instead of making it a thing others can actually see.)
Hell, I thought of something similar to this thing I just discovered this week. I can’t tell you how many times in my life that I’ve seen people come up with similar or even identical ideas I’ve had. It happens when you make stuff, and if it happens to you more than a few times in your life, doesn’t it make sense to stop retreating to the safety of your head and doing something with your ideas?
The Surprise of Real
With my current work in progress, I’ve told people close to me, “If I can make this manuscript even half of what it is in my head, it will be the best thing I’ve written to date!” That’s the expectation Laura talks about. In the safety of my head, this story is perfect.
Except it’s not!
In my head, it’s really nothing. At best, it’s an inflated idea, but it feels safe. I can already see things I will change in those opening chapters when the draft is done, so the expectation is deflated before the first draft is complete. So why not keep it safely tucked away in my head where it will always be perfect?
Something Better than Perfect
There have been moments in every novel I’ve written where I’ve jumped up from my chair, pointed at my screen, and yelled some kind of surprised victory cry.
“Holy crap, did I just fuckin’ write that?! Holy fuckin’ shit boogers on a stick!”
“Fuck yeah! Fuck yeah, that’s fuckin’ brilliant! Damn, that’s fuckin’ perfect!” (I really am a humble person…seriously!)
” . . .”
That last one? That’s me with my hand over my mouth in shock. Maybe my eyes are tearing up a bit as something all comes together in a way that makes everything I’ve ever imagined as perfect in the safety of my mind pale in comparison to what actually ended up on the page.
I had one of those moments last night…
The Point of It All
A point of Laura’s blog entry, and the point of this one, is that the work matters.
Rarely, now, do I write something I dislike, and I never think what I put down sucks. I write things I know I’ll make better in later drafts, but even then–I’ve written long enough to know that the reality is better than what was once protected in my head.
What ends up on the page may not feel safe, but nothing beats real!
“The History of Future Folk” – Is this the story of early Devo, before they found their sound? 😉
Thanks for another great post! This is my mantra: “The work matters.”
And this is what I aspire to: “Rarely, now, do I write something I dislike, and I never think what I put down sucks.” I’m still learning how to differentiate between what sucks and what doesn’t. Somehow I have an easier time doing this with other writers’ stories.
CMS: Yeah, they definitely have a DEVO energy dome thing going with their helmets! And DEVO did a folksy tune or two along the way.
I’m glad you liked the post. The stuff you’ve written that I’ve read…I’ve liked it. Some of it isn’t what I’d typically read, and I’ll go as far as saying you’ve written some stuff I’ve found fascinating, because you really just do your own thing. That takes guts. It’s not that what I write is written with a certain feel in mind; it’s more that’s the kind of stuff I’ve always wanted to write. I have a good friend who takes some wild chances with his writing, and even the times he’s written something that had moments that could have maybe been stronger (and who doesn’t do that?), he fascinates me like few writers do.
I’m not sure who your audience will be, but when you find it, based on what I’ve read, you will have rabid fans who will hopefully clamor for all you write.
lol Yep, I do my own thing . . mostly because when I started writing seriously, I didn’t know any better. I was quite familiar with standard fiction writing because I’ve always been an avid reader, but I forgot to apply that to my own writing. Now that I’ve learned a bit about what’s “expected” in terms of story structure, story arcs, etc, I still for the most part do my own thing because I love to experiment. Sometimes what I write works, sometimes it doesn’t, but I always have fun with it. 🙂
Future “rabid fans.” Can’t ask for more than that!
Nice entry. Besides, I was scared of what others would think… It was better in my mind…there’s “it would never work”. Of course, it also might work but we’ll never know, letting it stay safely in our heads to play.
And the movie trailer, gotta see it. 🙂
Mary: Definitely. So many people just say, “It won’t work,” before trying. It’s funny…I have a LiveJournal. I don’t update it much anymore, but I look at the archives now and then. Recently, I saw an entry from 7 years ago in which I solicited opinions about podcasting Hell Comes with Wood Paneled Doors. The general consensus (from people who didn’t listen to podcasts) was, “DON’T DO IT!!!”
I should have just done it then and listened to the one friend who was encouraging me the whole time to do it. Now: the same people who told me not to do it say, “You should podcast that other thing you wrote!” and some have had their own fiction end up as a podcast.
Now, if I have a vague idea that sticks around in my head, I just do it. I no longer solicit opinions until I’m already into it, and then I try seeking out those who understand what it is I’m trying to do. With the podcast, I get that people were worried I was giving something away for free. There are definitely arguments for and against free, but Hell Comes with Wood Paneled Doors gets more downloads each day than Men in Gorilla Suits gets all week. More than a handful of the people have listened have bought the e-book. It was a good idea that I sat on for years because I thought, “That won’t work…”
Unless it’s an idea limited to needing funds I don’t have, I’ll never make that mistake again…